Just think of me as the pages in your diary

I'm tired. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of not sleeping, my brain, my mind, my body, it's all very tired. How do you prepare your life. One day at a time. Minute by minute. I was here and now I'm not. I feel and now I don't. Your in my blog, your in my mind. My life. The support is here and it doesn't help any. Life is here and it doesn't help. I'm on a fucking roller coaster, wanna join me. You'll never see the twists and turns that's about to come. Your going to get thrown off the edge and your pulled right back. Edge, back... never ending roller coaster. Stomach is in a knot as you're getting higher. climbing to the top. About to go over that edge and then it's all down hill from there. Lows and highs and hugs and tears and I'm not in my body. I'm standing outside looking at my life. Watching it all unfold before my eyes. Watching everyone as they move by in slow motion. Put on a happy face, think positive.... that won't prepare me for that last final drop at the end. Nothing prepares you for that. It's not a place you've ever been and don't want to go but thanks for listening.