Where does the time go?

Mr. Jack man is getting so big so fast! I forget how fast the first year goes. Jack had his 4 month appointment along with those fun shots a few weeks ago and my little big guy weighed in at almost 17 pounds! He is my little fat man! I LOVE it! We are enjoying our time together after work and on the weekends! Alana is still being a super great big sister and LOVES to hug and squeeze the boy. Victor works a lot of nights and weekends so I get to spend a lot of quality time with the kiddo's, and while some days it's too much, I love hanging with them! The love Alana has for Jack is pretty amazing and I love when I can capture it in a picture! The LOVE of a sister and brother!













Me and my babes!



Jack is getting big enough to play in his saucer, which is so much fun to watch!

Big Sister is going to be 5 soon and is full of so much love. She is a very emotional almost 5 year old, and it scares the hell out of me. I can't even imagine a 12 year old Alana. We are in for a ride, that's for sure! She "graduates" preschool at the end of June and starts Kindergarten shortly after that! My baby is going to Kindergarten. That is madness! She took a Kinder assessment and passed with flying colors. She knows so much and is starting to be able to read words. Her little brain is soaking up so much! It's exciting to see her learn so much.

 

My baby guy is so full of smiles, but sometimes can be so hard to capture on camera. The second he see's the camera or phone, he stops smiling. I swear that's always the case right? Any second time parents out there will understand this issue I am having.... When Alana was born I was anti Pacifier, because I HATE that three year with one stuck in their mouth. You can't understand what they are saying, you can't see them smile. Take the damn pacifier out of their mouth! Alana ended up sucking her thumb because of it! ... Well damn. That's not what I wanted either. I can't take away her thumb like I can a pacifier. BUT at least she ONLY is allowed to do it in her bed at night and not while we are out at the grocery store or out to dinner. I am pretty strict about it too. Again, I hate to see those kids out in public in the middle of the day with their thumb stuck in their mouth! SO... being a second time mom, I told myself I was going to give Jack a pacifier so at some point we could be done with it. Not to mention with all of his crazy crying when he was born, it's the only way I could get him to be quite for a while. I tried and tried to give that stupid pacifier to him since the day he was born. I tried two different kinds. The kid would keep spitting it out. He was just not going to be a pacifier kid either! So he also found his thumb.... Hopefully I will be able to control that thumb sucking like we have been able to with Alana. But he loves his thumb! 

 

 

My little fat man does not want to roll over yet. He is almost there and wants to, but I'm pretty sure the size of those legs and the rolls on them are preventing him from actually rolling! Soon enough I will have a little rollie pollie on my hands like I did with Alana! 

 

 

 

This picture makes me smile because no matter what is going on, the second Alana starts to talk, he looks around for her and all of his attention is on her. He smiles at her and melts my heart. He loves his big sister! 

 

 

Here is my fat boy with no clothes on! I LOVE the rolls! I will be sad when he grows out of them like Alana did. He is a healthy boy, that's for sure!

 

Mother's Day



On Mother's Day this year we took Alana to go see Rain, the Beatles Tribute band! The day I told her we were going to see "The Beatles" in concert, she squealed so loud and jumped up and down, she was so excited! It made me so happy to see her so excited! Victor and I saw Rain a few years ago and the whole time we were there, we kept wishing we had brought Alana. We promised that when they came back into town we would take her to see them! I bought the tickets on a discounted website so I knew they wouldn't be great seats, but we didn't care, we were happy to be there! As soon as the curtains went up and Alana could see the Beatles on stage she was so excited! She looked at me and said "mom, is that the real Beatles"...... UM... Yes. I lied. She'll figure it out one day, but in the moment I couldn't tell her, even when she directly asked. Hell, she's only 4 so it's not like she understands anyway.

This was Alana's very first concert! Start them young! One of my favorite parts of the day was when I was asking Alana what song she was most excited to hear them play. She said "Hey Jude". Victor has been singing that song to her since the day she was born. If she can't sleep or he would be rocking her, that was the song he would sing to her. No twinkle twinkle, it was always Hey Jude. It always had a calming effect on her. So when she said it, it melted my heart!

 

During the performance you weren't allowed to take pictures, but I had to sneak one of Alana. During intermission Victor bought Alana drum sticks that say "Rain" on them. She used them to play the air guitar for the 2nd half of the show as she rocked out to her favorite Beatles songs.  They were done with their set and ready to end the show when they decided to play one last song. I assume like everyone else, they plan it that way... They sang "Hey Jude" as their very last song. It was pretty awesome! One of my other favorite parts was when the "Paul" of the bunch sang Yesterday. I balled my eyes out the whole song. It will forever remind me of my mom and it made me wish she could be there with us. I love to continue to teach my kids things that would make my mom proud!

As a close to Mother's Day we took Victor's mom and dad to dinner. A month or so ago, Alana and I made Grandma some stuff at Color me mine. Alana painted her a Mermaid Jewelry box and I made her a platter with Jack's footprint and Alana's handprint. They came out great and she appreciated the home made gifts. Not having my mom to hang out with on Mother's Day was tough and will always continue to be I'm sure. But I love my Mother In Law so much, and I am so thankful for her and all she does for us. This lady is pretty amazing! 



12 Weeks

My baby is 12 weeks, this time is going way to fast. Here is the last few weeks in pictures!

Jack was born an Angels fan :) Crazy to see Alana wear this same Angels onesie 4 1/2 years ago!

Smiles from my little-ness.

Chrissy and I took the girls bowling since Kali was on the last day of her spring break! They had a great time! Kali even beat me on the second game!

Me and my girl getting in some fun quality time!

Me and my beautiful God Daughter!

These girls are the best of buds and get along so well! I hope they will always be that way since Kali is like a daughter to me and her mom happens to be my best cousin!

Da na na na na na na na, JACKMAN!!

Any chance Alana gets she throws on one of her pretty dresses! She never used to be such a dress girl, but lately, even if she is just playing with her animals, she puts on one of her dresses. Which works out, because we don't even go enough places for her to wear them, so I am glad she is wearing them. But she cracks me up with them! My beautiful girl is going to be 5 in June!

This little man is always stylin! We have been blessed enough to have a few different people give us their boy clothes so Jack has several different styles to pick from. This is one of Daddy's favorites of course. My mom's best friend Debbie got this for him and he is super cute in it!

Easter this year was kinda weird... We didn't have any plans with either side of the family. We didn't dye eggs. We didn't do our big egg hunt. It was just an off year. Next year I will make sure is better and more normal for us! BUT the Easter Bunny did come visit us early in the morning and leave his tracks up and down the driveway for Alana and boy did she love it!! I honestly have the best and coolest neighbor!

Alana performed at her very first morning of Choir in the big church. She was pretty nervous and didn't really like being up on the stage in front of everyone, but she did GREAT and sounded awesome! We spent the whole week singing the two songs she needed to know for that morning and did awesome!

I have three weeks before I have to go back to work so I am soaking up all the cuddle time I can with my little man. I never thought I could love another, and the amount of love from a Mother to a son is just amazing to me! 

Proud to be me!

WARNING: If you are a boy, you may want to stop reading now.
No one told me that having two kids and trying to breast feed was going to be so hard. I mean, I know that breast feeding was hard, as I was only able to do it for like 10 days with Alana. But even acutely being able to do it is still so hard! Nurses, video's and hell even some of my friends make it seem like it's just so dang easy. And honestly, maybe it is just THAT easy for some people. I am NOT one of those people! I honestly had no idea how dedicated you have to be to keep it up. I had no idea how hard it was going to be to know if your newborn baby is even getting enough milk. It feels like there should be a science to this, but because every baby and mom are different, there just isn't. My friend Sarah always made it look and sound so easy, and it's because it was for her. I can't tell you how many random texts, phone calls and emails she got from me because I needed to know first hand how she did things and why. It worked so dang well for her, I wanted to know the "Sarahmethod" of doing things!
This week makes it 12 weeks of breast feeding! I didn't even make it 12 days with Alana! I sure am proud of myself that I made it 12 weeks! Every single day I would question if today was the day I was going to stop. I swear, just ask my best friend, Crystal, every 12 hours it was a different answer. One day would be great, and then the next 12 hours would be hell. I was really taking it, one day at a time! Somehow I've made it to 12 weeks and still debate with myself if today is going to be that day.

I have 3 more weeks before I have to go back to work (where the hell did that time go?) and I plan to stop before I have to go back. All though I know my boss would be fine with me taking the time to pump, I just know how crazy work is and how busy it is and I don't want to have to do all the work of pumping while working. So my goal was to stop by the time I have to go back to work. Yes, I am proud and I could stop at anytime, but I still struggle with myself. I planned to stop for super selfish reasons. I know that you grow emotionally attached to breast feeding the longer you do it, so that is hard as well. But I do remember when I stopped with Alana, it was the biggest weight lifted off of my shoulders. Stopping this time was more painful physically then emotionally for me.

It's just that stupid "mom guilt" that hits me. BUT, in talking to one of my cousins last weekend, she brought up a good point. Moms always have "mom guilt" no matter what. If it's not breast feeding it's something else. I have to go back to work, I stayed home with Alana for a good year! If I go to work, I feel guilty for not giving Jack that same time with me. Not being the stay at home mom I was for Alana.  If I stay home and don't go back to work I feel guilty at home like I'm not being that one stay at home mom that we all know that is amazing and does everything! There is always something I am going to feel guilty about, so I'll just try and remember that and say SCREW IT! Stupid mom guilt!

I have to remind myself often that there are so many things that I do well as a mother! I ROCK at a lot of things and I need to remember that when I start to feel overwhelmed and like I am failing as a parent in one way or another! I can't tell you how many people have said how awesome Alana is for her age. She never went through the terrible 2's and she's almost 5. She has always been a calm, well mannered kid. (for the most part) I am strict with her and stick to my guns. She listens well (for the most part) and does we we ask of her. We did a great job with her. I know we still have the hardest years to come with a girl, but so far so good! I plan to be the same mom to Jack! I can only hope that we stick to what we do and he will be just as good as Alana! I have to keep telling myself that it is possible to have two awesome kids. Right?!?! Right.

I may not be super mom, but I am trying my best to keep up with these two babies I love! I can only hope that one day Alana will grow up and respect and love me as much as I did my own mom!

For Mama

A few years before my mom passed away, I made her this for Mother's Day one year. It's a frame that I decorated with our picture in it and then the words are the song that I always said was my song to her. It's called Somebody's hero by Jamie O'Neil. If you know the words, you know how personal the song is. From the second I heard that song many years ago, it reminded me of my mom. She loved it and knew it was our special song. So when I made this, she cried and loved the gift! When she passed away I took it from her bedroom where she kept it and hung it up in my room. I see it every single day and every day it reminds me of her and her love for me. It reminds me of all that she did for me. If nothing else, it keeps a picture of us very close for me to see every single day.

When my best friend Ashley's mom passed away I wanted to make Ashley one. I know how awesome it makes me feel when I see mine. And just knowing what she is going through I wanted to make her feel the same way! Since she would be down here right after her birthday, I worked on it for her birthday present! Her and her mom's song was, You are my sunshine. She said her mom always sang that to her! So I did some what of the same thing for her, wrapped it and gave it to her while she was here. I know she loved it, although she didn't really say so in many words. It made her cry and I don't think she knew what to say! I hope she hangs it in her house, somewhere that she will see it every day and remind her of her mom's love for her.

Month Two

February pictures! I don't even know where to start with all of the pictures and stories I have. So first, picture overload and then maybe I'll have time to go back and fill in some stories :)

My littlest man is awake a lot more these days and getting so big! His 2 month appt he weighed in a 11 lbs and 12 ozs! He is a BIG BOY! Not that I expected any less. He is a great eater! He eats every two hours on the dot! Month 2 has been most challenging but he is worth every grey hair on my head and every tear shed.



He is happiest right after he eats!



My friend Christina bought him this cute outfit and it was perfect
because it happen to be 80 degrees out that week!
 

Big sister is always lovin on her baby brother!

Little Brother! Love this eyebrow look on him!

Snuggle time in bed with daddy!

Sometimes if this is where he falls alseep for a nap, this is where he stays!
He is a big snuggle bug!As was Alana, I am a lucky mommy!

He is my sunshine! I LOVE this! He is catching some rays!

My new Valentine!

Alana and I spent some time putting together this frame for Victor for Valentines day
with the pictures that my sister took! Those will be posted soon too I promise!

He looks like Brain from Pinky and the Brain in this picture and it cracks me up!

Alana loves holding her brother and feeding him!
The only thing she won't do is change his diaper! Do you blame her?

Just chilin

First trip to the beach!

Jack's first trip to the beach was when he was about 2 weeks old! We waste no time doing anything around here. We are NOT one of those parents who shelter our kids until they are 8 weeks old! That's a whole different post in itself!

I am lucky to have a great best friend that flew down here from Colorado after Jack was born! Ashley and David stayed at the house with us and spent a week here getting to know Alana more and meeting Mr. Jack! It was so nice to have them here! I missed them before they even left!

What's cool is that they were there for Alana's first trip to the beach as well. Now only if I could get them to move their butts back out here and they could be by the beach all the time!!! 



Ashley and David where their heart belongs... to the beach!

 Big sister playing in the sand

While we were down in Laguna, we took Jack for a
visit at Dad's hotel so everyone could meet our new little man!

Some QT with the kids

Aunt Ashley snuggling with Jack.

Mr. J-Dub

 Tuesday morning January 8th I woke up telling myself today is going to be the day! I had an OB appt and since I had been having contractions since Thursday last week I had hoped something would give. I dropped Alana off at Victor's moms house so I could go to my appt. I only ate breakfast because I wanted to be ready for my "no eating 8 hours before surgery". That day Grandma made her home made tortillas so when I arrived I had to stop myself from eating them up. I saw my OB and told her about our trip to Labor & Delivery last week and how I had been having contractions since then. She stuck to her no C-section rule before 39 weeks and I did everything I could to try to change her mind. Nothing worked. Then I asked her to check me before I left and see if I had dilated at all. She did, and I had gone to a 1!!! That meant my body was starting labor and she was going to call L&D and tell them we were on our way!
Victor texted me on the way down the elevator and said, How did your appt go? I texted him back. You should head home from work :) He called right away. I told him he needed to start heading home so we could go have this baby! I drove back to Grandma's house to drop Alana's overnight bag off and to tell them the news! Gave my baby girl hugs and kisses and told her I was going to have Jack tonight and we were on our way to the hospital, which she responded "Can I please stay at Grandmas?" Haha. She's such a Grandma's girl!

I headed home, called the few important people I needed to and sat and waited for Victor to get home so we could head to the hospital. That was seriously the longest wait of my life. Laguna Beach never seemed so far away!!! I was somewhat calm but more excited then anything.

We got to the hospital and waited to be taken into surgery for my C-section. Finally around 8 or so they took me over to the OR. This C-section was a LOT different from my first! With Alana I had already been in labor for 21 hours, with a lot of meds in me, they rolled me over to the OR and I barely remember any of it. This time around I walked my own two feet into the OR and got up on the table and ready for my spinal. I sat on the table and looked around the operating room. There was a board there ready for Jack's info to be written on there and a little heated table ready for him to lay. It made me tear up every time I looked at it. While the doctor's prepared I sat there and thought about how in less then 30 minutes or so I would finally get to meet my little man! I thought about how much I missed my mom. I know my mom already know about Jack before I did, but I was so sad she wasn't there to share this with me. She was such a BIG part of my pregnancy and delivery with Alana, I was sad she was missing this. I know she was there watching over us, but it's never the same.

Finally they gave me the spinal and promptly laid me down on the table, setting up all kinds of stuff around me. I remember I could see my stomach in the reflection in the light above me. I freaked out for a second as I thought I was going to be able to see everything they were doing as they cut into me. I asked the dr and they said they would be moving the lights and also the drape will be so high I wouldn't be able to see it anyway. I was happy about that one! After they draped me, it was time to go get the hubby. It seemed like a life time from the time I left him, to the time they let him in the room. I remember from last time I thought they were forgetting to let him in. He came and sat by me and held my hand and we both looked at each other in a nervous look! It was finally time! Then we heard Jack cry and they said he was a boy and it brought tears to my eyes! Next thing I knew I had Jack up to my check to say hi before they were going to send Victor and Jack out while they sewed me up.

*Love at first sight*

Jack and Daddy waiting for me to get out of surgery.

Apparently while I was still in surgery they noticed Jack's blood sugar was low for his birth weight. They decided they needed to feed him so they gave him some formula which I was not too happy about, what it was what was best for him.

 

When I was out of surgery they gave him to me and all I could do was kiss his little head and love on him!!

 

Meet Mr. Jack Wyatt. 8 pounds 14 oz. 21 inches long.



 

 

Jack was born around 8:45 on Tuesday night. The next few days were full of visitors from nurses, doctor's, specialist, friends and family. We were anxious to get home though, in the comfort of my own house and bed. Thursday was the day we were going home, less then 48 hours in the hospital was great for me! The hospital has a photographer they use to take new born pictures. We dressed him up in his tie to take a few pictures. My sister would be taking his newborn pics so I didn't make too much of this photo shoot. But we did dress him up!

The night Jack was born it was pretty late, close to 11 by the time Alana or anyone else was allowed in to see us. She was very tired and not up for any pictures, she came in, kissed us all and then wanted to go back to Grandma's to sleep. I don't blame her! So the next day she came in rested ready to hold her new baby brother!



 

 

We got home Thursday late afternoon and introduced Jack to the house and his room. He laid in his crib for a few minutes. I got the same picture of Alana when she came home in her crib and 4 years later is still is amazing to me that she was that tiny teeny in her crib.

 

We were so happy to be home and ready for everyone to come over to visit Little Jack. Big sister Alana wants to hold him 24/7 and is loving helping so much with him already!

 

Big shout out to Kaiser! Honestly I've never been in a better hospital. I thought St. Joe's was amazing with Alana but the brand new Kaiser they built was even more amazing! The service I received there was pretty awesome, from the random nurses in the hall, to the Anesthesiologist. They were all super friendly and pretty amazing!